Raising My Standards

Finding My Style

I’ve had an amazing opportunity to work with wardrobe consultant Safina Ruda. She offers a 3-part Signature Style package that includes an initial meeting where you bring an inspiration board (another use for dreamboards!) and talk about your tastes, your lifestyle and your loves, a wardrobe consultation, where she comes to your house and goes through your clothing with you and finally a shopping trip! This weekend was part 2 for me!

It was an amazing experience to try on everything I own to show Safina. How I felt about showing her was often the determining factor of whether something stayed or went. If I was kind of embarrassed and unsure – gone! If I wanted to walk in beaming – keep! One thing I noticed was how important it was to me to express what it was about a particular item that had drawn me. So even if the piece wasn’t that successful, we knew that in my wardrobe I wanted sparkle, tailoring, sass, that kind of thing.

This experience wasn’t about someone else telling me my style. It was about getting clarity. It was about reminding myself what I truly love and holding that as the standard. For example, I like to dress a little bit formal. I don’t feel at my best in yoga pants or comfy jeans. I also work from home, so it’s a bit silly to pull out pinstriped pants or a sparkly shirt, right? Not so, says Safina. “Every day is special.” “You love it, you feel great in it, so why not wear it?” And the moment she says that, I know that I believe that too. That I’ve always believed that. How did I forget?

Safina set me a great tool for remembering. I’m not generally a shoe person, but I’m wild about the 2 pairs I have in that picture. I just lit up when I showed Safina the vintage metallic kitten heels. So, she told me to use that as my standard. “If you don’t love it as much as those shoes, let it go.” The goal is to aim for that lit-up energy when I pull anything out of my closet and put it on. Imagine!

And so I cleared with enthusiastic abandon. 4 large garbage bags of clothing will be finding new homes. I’m sure I’ve bagged up at least half of my wardrobe. Now when I get up in the morning and look at my options, sure, there’s a lot less to choose from but I love what’s there. And if those limitations mean I put on a spangly top or a pretty dress to spend the day at home and coach my clients – awesome! I feel great.

Raising your standards can be a bit intimidating. Often our wardrobe and our lives are filled with the mediocre because we know we can have it. It’s achievable. How do we know we can find/get/achieve the amazing? We don’t know. But we can have a bit of trust in ourselves and the Universe and take the chance. We just might find something truly remarkable on the other side. I’m going to go for it! How about you?

How can you get rid of the mediocre to make room for the amazing?

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